Since a lot of us consider ourselves to be shy or introverted, I thought this article from the New York Times might be interesting. It's an opinion piece that discusses how there are some situations where being the person sitting in the periphery might be helpful, and I think it can actually be applied to the changing world of publishing.
In a nutshell, the people who are always aggressive and throw themselves into new things also risk being the first victims of these new things. The people sitting on the sidelines have the chance to watch those first brave people experiment. On the other hand, there are situations where adapting quickly could also be helpful.
Here are some quotes from the article:
"[I]t's also possible the young woman is 'just shy,' or introverted -- traits our society disfavors. One way we manifest this bias is by encouraging perfectly healthy shy people to see themselves as ill."
"Shyness and introversion are not the same thing. Shy people fear negative judgment; introverts simple prefer quiet, minimally stimulating environments."
"[B]usiness self-help guides often suggest that introverted leaders practice their communication skills and smile more. But...it may be extrovert leaders who need to change, to listen more and say less."
"But had the sitters taken Zoloft and become more like bold rovers, the entire family of pumpkinseed sunfish would have been wiped out."
"If we continue to confuse shyness with sickness, we may find ourselves in a world of all rovers and no sitters, of all yang and no yin."
Shy people tend to be quite charming once drawn out, as well as perceptive. To be reticent tends to encourage an observing eye.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing the article with us!
ReplyDeleteSuze, I tend to be quite charming once drawn out. :P
ReplyDeleteSandra, you're welcome!
FP, You came to mind as I was reading this article. The author does point out that there are situations where the trailblazer approach wins out, though, and hopefully that will come up for you. I really hope for that.
Davin, thank you for that article and your thoughts on it. I've always tried to push away the assumption that there's something wrong with me because I'm "introverted" or "shy" or "extra sensitive" but it's hard not to feel that way because I grew up socially conditioned to think those things. It's sad and ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteFrankly, it's hard for me to step into all this publishing stuff - self-published or traditionally. Both have been very difficult for me, but rewarding, too. It's simply a transition, one I'm trying to step into as gracefully as I can.
Michelle, I know at least one friend who tried to publish, got a good reception, and then decided she wasn't interested anymore. I think as writer we are told that one path is the best path, but maybe we should all try to find what works best for us. I know I'm not enjoying the promotional part of publishing, and I've minimized it so far. Everything I do in terms of promotion takes a lot of courage first.
ReplyDeleteThis is a fascinating discussion. Personally I've always been BOTH shy and introverted, but I've always said it was because most people suck.
ReplyDeleteI like the idea the article puts across though, about the sunfish.
Matthew, I thought the sunfish examples were useful too. It shows that both types of people can face challenges that will work out to their advantage. Some people do suck, unfortunately.
ReplyDeleteNo. We must all be the same. Those who aren't are sick.
ReplyDeleteFP, I don't think you shut anything down. I just had a few hours of meetings and am just getting back to my computer now.
ReplyDeleteNevets, Yes. Then, no.
While the bold extroverts are out there playing around and making fools of themselves, we shy introverts are building the machines that will allow us to rule the world. No, you'd never guess that, would you, bold extroverts?
ReplyDeleteMum, Scott. Ix-nay on the secret an-play.
ReplyDeleteDomey, they won't take the time to read this far down in the comments. They've got Things To Do and Places To Be and all of that. Sekretplansafe.
ReplyDeleteYay...there's hope for me. Awesome.
ReplyDeleteI wanna take all the extroverts outside and embarrass them in public.
ReplyDeleteOh, wait.
No.
That's what they want to do me.
That was an excellent article. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteA long but interesting read. Thanks for sharing. Much to think about.
ReplyDeleteHave a great 4th of July weekend!
People don't believe me when I tell them I'm introverted/shy. I don't trailblaze and I'm rarely among the first to something, but in a reasonably like-minded group I can take the lead and push things along.
ReplyDeleteBut for my relaxation there's nothing like a cup of tea, some biscuits and total silence.
As I see it, extroverts are just more ballsy than introverts. They're the ones willing to take risks that either pay off or screw you over.
ReplyDeleteIntroverts take in all of their data before deciding what to do. They act in measured ways, but that often causes them to get lost in the crowd.
Extroverts need to practice stepping back and introverts need to know when it's okay to be bold.
I find those quotes very encouraging. I am often frustrated when my personality is spoken of as a defect.
ReplyDeleteNeither introverts no extroverts are broken. There is no holy middle ground to which they must seek.
ReplyDeleteIf someone feels that his or her extroversion has become an obstacle to achieving some goals, that's one thing, but there is no inherent need to change your introversion or extroversion in order to satisfy the universe.
There's nothing more rewarding than getting to know an introvert. Really, really know them.
ReplyDeleteI know this for a fact :~)
Not that I have anything against extroverts- some of the people I love most are among them. Variety in life is great--and watching extroverts out there in the world is extremely educational! Especially Artisan extroverts but that's a whole other show :~D
I love that line about the fish. Just keep swimming!
~bru